XENOGEARS: A ROPE OF ROBOTS
(part six)

So apparently our heroes were so excited about fighting in touraments and swimming up waterways that they did not bother coming up with an escape plan. That's okay! Running around randomly until they find the exit works, too! For now they are stuck in an elevator, having no idea where it goes, doing the awkward staring intently into space on an elevator thing. Ah ha, ground floor! Let's see where they are.

In another game entirely! Well, that's cool.

No, wait, that's the Aveh airship we saw before!

That's cool, too!

Luckily the dock is only staffed by stormtroopers who run in single file and don't shoot things, so they manage to run away. Yes, this is certainly a viable escape plan! They end up in some kind of living quarters area, and they comically collide with Elly on her way out her door. Gebler officers ought to have mirrors installed or something.

Elly!

Fei!

Bart!

Doctor Scott!

Quick, get in here!

She shoves them all into her quarters. Hot? The single file group of stormtroopers runs past, and that is apparently all you have to do to evade the Gebler army. Bart is not thrilled with this turn of events.

Fei, this woman is very clearly an enemy.

No, Elly isn't an enemy!

Actually, I am! I'm in Gebler, AKA the Special Forces of the Sacred Empire of Solaris, which helped invade Aveh and kill the entire royal family. Also I stole a Kislev robot, crash landed it in your village, and left everyone there to die.

 

But... you're so pretty.

The defense raises a valid point.

You are both fired.

Bart does not trust this officer from the army that killed his family and occupied his country, because he is a bigot. But that is just too bad, because she's going to help them escape! She is also highly incompetent, you see. They run back to the dock, which is under intruder alert and therefore completely deserted.

Be free, little lambs!

Elly, you should come with us!

You are really clearly not fit for the army!

I'd like to, but, oh, alas, I don't really feel like it. I don't even have enough motivation to put on pants.

Fei is sad, but they leave without her in a stolen robot that she hot-wires for them. Does this place not have security cameras? Performance reviews, anything? Oh, well. Ramsus rounds up the troops to persue them.

Even stormtroopers try to shoot the heroes, come on! Miang, go warm up the engine in my giant robot.

One of his men steps forward with a letter! It's from Hyuga. Gee.

Hell, let me see that.

Blah blah, weather is nice, kid made honor roll, how are you, blah blah... oh, dammit.

Miang, put it back in the garage!

That fool! What could he be doing here?

DUN DUN DUN!

I-- No, Miang, there's plenty of space, just back it-- you've got like ten feet. No, more to the left. Okay, that's fine! Just park it!

Our heroes make it back to the Yggdrasil safely! Minus Citan, who is presumably still back at the beer tent. Everyone is happy that Margie is back, and they set sail for Nisan. Who even needs Citan? Bart's minders politely ask Margie why she was so stupid, and she says she went into Bledavik because she heard a rumor that her mother and grandmother were still alive.

But... Perfect Works says they committed suicide twelve years ago.

Perfect Works also says I want to marry Bart. Perfect Works was written by a mad man.

Point well taken.

Margie, the next time you want to do something stupid and reckless, tell me first! I will do it for you!

Maison takes Margie off to her quarters, and Fei and Bart head for the bridge! But they can't get in, for something terrible blocks their path.

Ugh, when was the last time I had my cootie shot? I don't remember. Let's make Margie move it.

Margie, move your stupid doll!

But, lo.

HELLOOOOO, BOYS

 

 

 

Sure, okay.

The horrible pink creature that is proof that God exists and hates the inhabitants of this planet is called Chuchu and it proceeds to hit on Fei, which Bart thinks is hilarious, because it's not him.

Ha ha, I'm going to go wait outside. Tell me when you've killed it.

Say, Fei, have you seen Bart's back?

Why... why would I have seen Bart's back.

Why would you even ask that.

Hey, I don't judge, I'm just the pope.

Is it the wedding dress in my back pocket? It's not even mine. It's a long story!

Margie tells Fei that way back in the day Shakahn took both her and Bart prisoner, and Bart was beaten nearly to death while trying to protect her. Margie blames herself! Margie, it is not your fault if some guys get their jollies from whipping six-year-olds.

So this was all pretty anti-climactic for you, is what you're saying.

On the scale of dramatic rescues I give it about a 6.5. But thank you!

Fei and Bart head back to bridge, hoping the pink thing will just go away by itself. They have more important things to worry about. Like exposition! Sigurd, what do you know.

Ramsus is the commander in chief of Gebler and has way better things to do than dig up robots. Something is up.

Way up.

And upside down!

Sigurd saves the good exposition for cute girls and suspicious doctors. Speaking of which!

Where is that suspicious doctor, anyway?

Hyuga

DUN DUN DUN

Oh, dammit, I forgot that was on.

Citan has not returned yet. ...which I suppose he would have a hard time doing, since we left Bledavik without him.

And then, somehow, Citan returns to the ship anyway. Perhaps he caught a cab. He and Sigurd hole up in the gun room and talk shit about the villains. Hmm.

Oh my god, I can't believe Ramsus is here.

Miang is here, too!

THAT BITCH

So I guess that means we are all here on the surface now.

crypticism

mysteriousness

Their crypticism and mysteriousness is justified, because Fei is being a little shit and spying on them from the stairs.

HEY THERE DONG BREATH

shhhh

Oh, are we spying? I love spying.

So I guess Citan and Sigurd know each other.

Yeah.

And Citan got back to the ship somehow.

Yeah.

Well summed up, Fei.

The Yggdrasil docks at Nisan, which is lovely and provincial and full of people who know embarrassing stories about Bart from when he was six. Word here is that Bledavik is gearing up to attack Nisan and there is a big influx from people all over the country, because they want to be where the attack is? Huh. The people of Nisan themselves are off hiding in the mountains, which seems like a better plan. Everyone is very happy that the Holy Mother is not dead! Margie takes Bart, Fei, and Citan to the church, where she is mobbed by nuns.

The pope is back, baby!

She takes the party upstairs where they can get a proper look at the cathedral, which is, you know, cathedraly. There is a pretty stained glass window and a pair of statues suspended from the ceiling depicting one-winged angels.

Kefka and Ex-death apparently declined to renew their contracts.

According to legend, God could have made humans perfect, but then they would have attacked Him with giant robots or something, so he nerfed them so they would have to depend on each other to... fly. ...Sorry, that metaphor got away from me.

It must symbolize the path to God!

Well... we are in a church.

Those certainly are some anatomically correct angels.

I question the aerodymanics of this religious metaphor!

If you can't handle statues then I'm going to make you look at a painting!

Ouch. She takes everyone to another room with a big painting that is certainly not of anyone we know who had to be saved from a dinosaur.

Fei wakes up for this one.

So, Fei, what do you think?

I think someone dressed Elly up as a nun and painted her. That's... weird.

Oh, goodness, Fei, what are you talking about?

...What are you talking about?

This art style is almost identical to yours!

You've never actually seen any of my paintings, have you.

Well, you're both wrong, this painting is like five hundred years old. God, the art history tour is wasted on you!

Suddenly, Fei has a vision of himself painting this portrait and of Elly sitting in for it. She calls him "Lacan." Oh my stars, what could this meeeeeaaaaaaan. ...If you guessed "Fei is crazy-pants" you are pretty much 80% of the way there.

I AM SO BORED, YOU GUYS